The church was unusually full from the men’s retreat earlier that day. The singing filled the nave. It was glorious. There was one song in particular that was just amazing, and it brought tears to my eyes and a joy in my heart. I didn’t want it to end. “This must be a taste of heaven.” I thought.
The next day at Liturgy was much different. It was back to the usual thing - managing kids constantly. I didn’t even have time to let my mind wander, which is my usual struggle if I’m not juggling little ones. I had barely a moment to enter into the prayer, to even contemplate the sacredness of what was happening. But I did have one, reassuring, simple, yet deep, thought: even if I cannot realize the deepness, holiness, and truth of the church, it is still so. Even if I can’t engage in the prayers and hymns, they are still prayed and sung - even by angels. Even if I can’t grasp the miracle of Jesus, He still is. The Orthodox Faith is not dependent on me, my mood, or my ability to realize it.
The Church is not dependent on my whims and emotions. She is still what she is no matter my ability to appreciate it. She is bigger than me. I make her a part of my life and I am a part of her. And if I am busy taking care of my kids, or tired, or just anything, then I can rest in her strength knowing she will carry on - and carry me with her.
I hope you all had a blessed Pascha! Enjoy your Bright Week!
CHRIST IS RISEN! TRULY HE IS RISEN!